Honestly, there’s no “right” age to start dating – it’s all about when you feel ready. Some people start dating in their early teens, while others wait until much later, and both are totally fine.
What really matters is that you're comfortable, confident, and in a place where you feel ready to navigate the challenges that come with relationships. If you do decide to start dating, remember, that the person you chose should always be someone who respects you and your boundaries! Don’t rush into anything just because everyone else seems to be doing it - just go at your own pace. (Also remember that it is important to be able to talk about the relationship with a trusted adult)
It’s really awesome that you care about your girlfriend’s feelings and want to make sure she's comfortable — that’s a great start! The best way to approach it is by keeping it simple and respectful. You could say something like, "Hey, I’d really like to kiss you, but only if you're okay with it." This gives her the space to say yes or no without feeling pressured. Also remember to be clear when asking for consent, so if she says that she would also like to kiss you – you could then say, “Is it okay if I kiss you now?”
It’s important to pay attention to how she’s feeling in the moment—if she seems relaxed and happy, that’s a good sign. But remember, even if she says no, it doesn’t mean she doesn’t like you; she might just not be ready yet, and that’s totally okay.
What matters most is that you both feel comfortable and respected. Communication is key, and it’s really cool that you’re thinking about how to ask in the right way!
e are really sorry to hear you're going through this, and it’s so brave of you to reach out. Abuse is never okay, no matter what, and it’s important that you don’t try to deal with this on your own. You deserve to be safe and treated with respect.
The first step is to talk to someone you trust, whether that's a friend, parent, teacher, counsellor or another trusted adult. If it feels too hard to say out loud, you can always write it down or message someone for help.
Calling Kids Helpline is a good place to start – they are super friendly, open 24/7 and can help you no matter who is abusing you. Call 1800 55 1800, or they have a webchat option - https://kidshelpline.com.au/get-help/webchat-counselling . They are able to help anyone aged 5 – 25yo.
In Cairns, there are also these services:
For support for sexual abuse: True Family & Child Service (you can call 4281 6893),
For domestic &/or family violence support: Cairns Regional Domestic Violence Service (4033 6100), where they can offer support and advice on what steps to take to stay safe.
You don't have to handle this alone — there are people who want to help you. If you're in immediate danger, please don’t wait. Call 000, or talk to someone as soon as you can. You deserve to live without fear, and there are people ready to help you.
It’s totally normal to be curious, especially when you're close with someone and want to understand them better. The thing is, you can't really know if someone is gay unless they tell you. Everyone figures out their identity in their own time, and it’s important to give your friend space to feel comfortable sharing when they’re ready.
If they do open up to you, just be supportive and show that you’ve got their back. But if they don’t, that’s cool too! What really matters is that you keep being a good friend and treating them the same way you always have.
At the end of the day, everyone deserves to be themselves without feeling pressured. And hey, if you’re ever confused or have questions, that’s totally fine — it shows you care! Friendship is all about trust, so just keep being the awesome friend you already are.
