Q What is the difference between sexualisation and sexuality? Sexuality is a normal and healthy part of our identity. Simply put, sexuality is how we expressourselves as a sexual being. It describes how important sexual expression is in a person's life, how one chooses to express that sexuality, and any preference one may have towards the type of sexual partner they choose. The way we choose to behave sexually is as individual and complicated as the ways we choose to dress or earn a living. Human sexuality rarely falls into neat categories or lends itself to simple labeling, but rather is a rich and complex area of human experience. Sexualisation, on the other hand, is very different to sexuality. It involves;
  • when a person’s value comes only from his or her sexual ‘hotness’ or behaviour, without taking in to account their personality,
  • a person’s physical attractiveness is judged by how ‘sexy’ they are (sexy being defined by what popular culture and the media tells us is sexy),
  • a person is sexually objectified — that means that they are made into a thing for other peoples sexual use, rather than seen as an individual person,
  • sexuality is inappropriately forced upon a person (like when an adult expression of sexuality is forced onto children who are not, at all, at that stage of their development).
Q How do you last long in sex? The length of sex is going to be different for each couple, and even each encounter between the same people will be different.  Sometimes people might brag about how long they last or how big they are, but really these things have more to do with body image than they do with sexual enjoyment. The most important thing, if you are concerned about whether or not your partner is enjoying it, is to communicate honestly. See other questions in this section on pleasing a girl and foreplay for more information.
Q What is a good age to have a boyfriend/girlfriend? Everybody is different so it’s not so much about the actual age you are, but about whether or not you feel comfortable with the rights and responsibilities that come with having a relationship.
Q How do I know if somebody likes me? Because everybody is different, everybody will have different ways of behaving when they like someone. However, some of the more common things include looking at you a lot, finding ways to be near you, possibly showing off a bit when you’re around them. The only definite way to know is for you to ask them.