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Someone fighting “for you” might be presented as romantic or protective, but violence can quickly make things more dangerous for everyone. A caring partner should listen to what you want and help you feel safe, not make the situation bigger or decide that fighting is the answer.
 
Once everyone is safe, tell the person you're dating clearly that you do not want them fighting for you. Pay attention to how they respond. Taking responsibility and respecting your boundary is very different from blaming you, boasting about the fight or using jealousy as an excuse.
 
If they regularly start fights, threaten people, control who you speak to or make you feel frightened, talk to a trusted adult or support person. You can also use the support links on this page to speak privately with someone who can help you work out what to do next. Kids Helpline is available on 1800 55 1800, and 1800RESPECT is available on 1800 737 732. If anyone is in immediate danger, call 000.
 
You are not responsible for their decision to fight, and you do not have to stay with someone whose behaviour makes you feel unsafe.
First, you did nothing wrong. You were honest, you were kind and you said no. That was enough.
 
Being rejected can hurt, but trying to punish you for it is not okay, and it is not your job to make them feel better by changing your answer. If you need to, send one clear message: “I’ve already said no. I need you to stop contacting me and leave me alone.” Then stop arguing your case. “No” is a complete answer, not the beginning of a negotiation.
 
Save screenshots and details of what they are doing, then block them where you can. Tell a trusted adult, teacher or school wellbeing worker, especially if they are spreading rumours, threatening you, following you, repeatedly contacting you or trying to damage your friendships or relationship. You can also contact Kids Helpline on **1800 55 1800** for private support.
 
That sounds really hurtful and exhausting, I'm sorry this is happening. Liking someone should be exciting, not something that makes you dread school, your group chat or the next “joke” someone is going to make.
 
You do not need everyone’s approval to date someone you like and of course it's normal that not everyone get's along... But respect means accepting that you like them and not making either of you feel bad about it.
 
If it feels safe, be direct: “You’ve made the joke. It wasn’t funny. Stop.” You do not have to laugh along, defend your relationship or convince anyone that the person you like is “good enough.”
 
If it keeps happening, it is no longer harmless. Save screenshots, block or mute people online and tell someone who will actually help, like a trusted adult, teacher or school wellbeing worker. You could also talk privately with Kids Helpline on 1800 55 1800 or through their online chat too.
 
And check in with the person you’re dating too. You’re both dealing with this, and neither of you should have to handle it alone. Please remember that people can (and will) always have opinions, but they do not get a vote in your relationship. You deserve friends who might not always understand your choices, but still treat you and the person you care about with respect.
This is a fair question, and it helps to understand what being transgender means first. A transgender guy is someone who was labelled female when he was born but knows that he is a guy. He may change his name, appearance or pronouns, and some trans people also take hormones or have surgery. This is called transitioning, but there is no single way to transition.
 
A transgender guy will not produce sperm, so he cannot get someone pregnant through sex. However, if he still has a uterus and ovaries, he may be able to become pregnant himself if sperm enters his vagina. Taking testosterone does not always prevent pregnancy, so contraception may still be needed.
 
Gender identity tells us who someone is, but it doesn’t always tell us what reproductive organs they have or what their body can do. Every trans person’s body and transition are different, so it is best not to make assumptions. Excellent question!