Before you look at how you get a girlfriend, a good thing is to work out why you would like a girlfriend. Is there someone you have romantic feelings for? Is it because some of your friends have girlfriends?
If there is someone you are interested in, there are many ways you could go about asking them out. You could start off building a friendship, seeing if you have common interests, morals and values that are similar. If this goes well and you feel like you and this person would work well in a romantic relationship, then you could ask the person out on a date.
You can do this in a few ways, if you feel too nervous to do it face to face, you could send them a message asking them if they would like to go out with you. If you would prefer to do it in person, its important to choose your time well. Maybe somewhere away from your peers, where you can both talk respectfully and honestly about it.
Something to consider before this is that you may not always get the answer you are hoping for. Be prepared for this and remember how important it is to be respectful no matter what. If the person you like tells you they would not like to date you, respectfully accept their answer and remember, you deserve to date someone who feels as excited about the relationship as you, so their honesty is a good thing. Using respect and being prepared when asking someone out makes room for a healthy friendship If the feelings are not mutual. And if they are mutual, congratulations! You and your girlfriend can enter into a relationship that started with respect.
~ Christie
We know that boys and girls can both do lots of the same things - boys and girls are both smart, sporty, creative, adventurous, kind etc. So we know that in reality boys are not more than girls, or better than girls. I am interpreting your question as, “even though boys and girls can do lots of the same things equally as well, why are girls thought to be less than boys?”
This is known as gender inequality, and it started many years ago when things were very different in society. To give you a very brief snapshot; historically, females were considered the nurturers, the bearers of children, and the ‘homemakers’, and men were the providers, considered the head of the family. Over time as technology and science evolved, so did society and gender roles. Along with the advancements, such as the contraception pill for women, childcare, and education, women entered the workforce and began challenging traditional gender roles which meant that men were doing things that only women used to do, and women were doing things that only men used to do.
Our society today recognises that girls and boys are both very capable and can do lots of the same things equally as well, however because our society had made decisions about how girls and boys should be, for example “boys are more sporty and never cry” and “girls should wear dresses and always present themselves nicely” sometimes boys and girls are not considered equal, even though they are. When this happens sometimes boys and girls are not given the same opportunities.
It's important that you know that as a girl, or a boy you should be given the same opportunities and that you should not be left out or discriminated against because you are a girl/boy. If you are in this situation, its important you talk to your parents or teachers about it to see if you can be included in the activity.
That’s a great question. In balanced relationships such as friendships and romantic relationships, there should be an equal balance of power. This means that both/all people in the relationship have equal rights and responsibilities which are things such as treating each other with respect, kindness, safety, empathy and compassion and be able to expect these things in return.
One of the most clarifying questions you can ask is “do we have the same amount of power in this relationship?”. If the relationship is a friendship or romantic relationship, for it to be healthy, it's important to have an equal balance of power so that both people feel safe to express themselves freely and openly and still be treated with respect, even when you might have a disagreement.
In different types of relationships there are some different rights and responsibilities and it's important to know what your rights and responsibilities are and where the boundaries are in those relationships.
Examples of relationships that may be unbalanced are things like, teacher and student, sports coach and player, parent and child, police officer and member of the public. In these situations, there is an unequal balance of power, however this is for the protection of the community and in these cases, the person with more power also has more responsibility to behave respectfully and maintain the safety of those they have power over.
- Christie
