Remind yourself that there are many, many people your age that haven’t kissed or gone out with someone before and for most people in your age group this relationship stuff is all new. It’s one of the ‘jobs’ of adolescence to learn how to relate to people in ways that are different from when you were kids. And new things are always a bit scary. If you go out with someone or kiss someone that you are already really comfortable with, you’ll feel less self-conscious and may even be able to talk to them about how you’re feeling.
Disagreements and discussions are part of communicating in a respectful relationship. Having a fight doesn’t need to mean a break-up but it does mean that you have an issue that needs to be resolved. If there are any power and control issues in the fighting, then it is not a healthy and respectful relationship.
Everybody is different so it’s not so much about the actual age you are, but about whether or not you feel comfortable with the rights and responsibilities that come with having a relationship.
As always, to get a definitive answer, you’ll need to ask them. It might be a really uncomfortable and difficult conversation to have but not knowing is uncomfortable too. You don’t know what the expectations and boundaries are if you don’t know how the relationship is defined.
