In the Respect Me program, we do talk a fair bit about violence against men in addition to violence against women. In Australia, about 1 in 16 males are physically abused by their partners, 1 in 20 are sexually abused, and 1 in 2 experience violence in the community – also usually from other men in places like clubs and other entertainment venues. However, the majority of the victims/survivors of intimate partner violence are female (about 4 - 5 times more women than men), and they experience a repeated pattern of abuse from their partners - so we have more scenarios/examples in the program that reflect that fact. The statistics come from thousands of people being surveyed and interviewed as part of the Census and research studies as well as hospital and police data.
This does not mean in any way that women can’t be abusive. 1 in 6 men experience emotional abuse in their lifetime, and there is evidence that both men and women use emotional, social and financial abuse in relationships. Women can also be physically violent, but less often and generally with less physical impact.
Intimate partner violence is a problem that affects all of us, and we want to work together to create a safer community that supports men, women and gender diverse people to have safe and healthy relationships. If you would like more information on male victim/survivors of intimate partner violence, as well as ways men can participate in creating a safer and more equal world, we recommend Mensline https://mensline.org.au/family-violence/
Less than 1.6%. False reports of car theft are 2.6%.
There is no such thing as ‘gray rape’. But I expect that you’re asking about rape where it’s not really rape. And just so you’re sure – there is no rape where it’s not really rape - rape is rape. However people (rape apologists) may like to dress it up (or down) by using terms like ‘date rape’, 'marital rape’, or ‘she changed her mind half way through’... sex without consent is rape. It's ideas like this that feed the rape culture belief that rape is only ‘real’ rape when it’s a stranger, even though women are three times more likely to be raped by someone they know.
No. Nobody EVER asks to be raped. Being raped means being forced or coerced in to sex with another person. The idea that some women ‘invite’ rape by being drunk, or going to a party alone, or wearing this, that or the other is what is called victim-blaming – and victim blaming is a horrible, horrible part of rape culture. Victim blaming tells the victim that ‘if they got raped, it’s their fault and if they don’t want to face that fact then they should shut up’. Victim blaming leaves the victim feeling responsible for a crime that was committed against them, isolated from support and humiliated. Victim blaming encourages people to stay quiet. And when people stay quiet, nothing changes. It also tells rapists (just so we’re clear, that’s people who have sex with someone without their enthusiastic consent) that their behaviour and the choices that they made are not their fault. Rape is the fault of the rapist. And that is that.
